Vampire Diaries: Facebook Style
by passing.strange
Summary: Each episode as seen through facebook. Short, silly, and a lot like Tinkerbell: IT NEEDS REVIEWS TO LIVE! Lots of Delena undertones, of course.
1. Pilot

_**I love Vampire Diaries, I love Facebook, hence...a VDFB story! It's kinda silly, very OC, and each chapter will be based off of a new episode. Let me know what you think in a review!**_

**Elena Gilbert** is fine. Thanks.

_(__**Caroline Forbes**__ and __**Bonnie Bennett **__like this)_

**Caroline Forbes **you know who else is fine? That new kid in the office.

_(__**Bonnie Bennett **__and __**sixty five **__other friends like this)_

**Bonnie Bennett **talk about hot back.

**Elena Gilbert** and hot face...

**Matt Donovan **come on, have you seen his forehead?  
Someone should tell him to take the brooding down a notch.

_(__**Tyler Lockwook**__, __**Jeremy Gilbert**__, and __**ninety eight**__ other friends like this)_

**Caroline Forbes **someone should tell Matt to take the jealousy down a notch...

**...**

**Jeremy Gilbert ** to **Vicky Donovan: **hey, wanna chill at the party this weekend?

**Elena Gilbert **Chill, really? More stoner talk Jer?

**Vicky Donovan **female Gilbert, can you tell your brother to back the fuck off and stop creeping?

_(__**Tyler Lockwood**__ likesthis)_

**Tyler Lockwood **that's my girl, getting rough ;)

**Vicky Donovan **just for you baby ;)

**Jeremy Gilbert **...vomit.

_(__**Matt Donovan **__likes this)_

_**...**_

**Elena Gilbert **is friends with **Stefan Salvatore**

**Caroline Forbes **lucky bitch.

_(__**Thirty three **__friends like this)_

**...**

**Stefan Salvatore **to **Elena Gilbert: **I like your shirt :) very sparkly.

**Elena Gilbert **aweh thanks! I like your shirt too.

**Stefan Salvatore **how come? It's just a normal shirt.

**Elena Gilbert** it shows off your muscles ;)

**Stefan Salvatore **oh...maybe I'll wear it more often then ;)

**Caroline Forbes **OH MY GOD YOU'RE SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER SHUT UP.

_(__**Matt Donovan **__and __**forty**__ other friends like this)_

**Elena Gilbert **sorry Care.  
Message me Stefan :)

**Jeremy Gilbert ***facepalm*

**Matt Donovan **^^I second that.

...

**Elena Gilbert **to **Stefan Salvatore: **I know I already said this, but thanks for giving my journal back.

**Stefan Salvatore **it was my pleasure :)  
Are you still going to that party tonight?

**Elena Gilbert **only if you are :)

**Caroline Forbes **to quote Jeremy...vomit.

_(__**Jeremy Gilbert**__, __**Matt Donovan **__and __**twenty **__other____friends like this)_

**Stefan Salvatore** I guess I'll see you there then :)

**Jeremy Gilbert** Jesus, just get a room already!

**...**

**Elena Gilbert **scary night...Vicky, you're in our thoughts and prayers.

_(__**Matt Donovan, Jeremy Gilbert, **__and__**ninety five **__other friends like this)_

**Matt Donovan **thanks Elena, it means a lot.

**Elena Gilbert **any time Matty.

**Caroline Forbes **Elenaaaaaaaaaaaa don't be so meannnnnnnnnn to poor Mattyyyyyyyyy.

**Elena Gilbert **Caroline, you're drunk. Go home.

_(__**Fifteen **__people like this)_

...

**Damon Salvatore **joined Facebook.

_Relationship status:_ it's complicated.

_Birthday:_ Not even gonna go there.

_Interests:_ Pussy, blood, Katherine, fucking bitches. And ruining Stefan's life, of course.

_Religion:_ Myself.

**(no subject)  
**_between __**Damon Salvatore**__ and __**Stefan Salvatore**_

**Stefan Salvatore **Damon.

**Damon Salvatore** hellloooooo, brother.  
Accept my friend request!

**Stefan Salvatore **you're an ass.

**Damon Salvatore** never claimed to be anything more.  
See you at home, brother!

**Stefan Salvatore **Religion: Myself? Really?  
And don't you think the blood thing is a little obvious?

**Damon Salvatore **Buzzkill Bob.


	2. Night of the Comet

_**Wow, thank you guys so much for all the amazing reviews/favourites/etc! This one kinda strayed a bit away from the episode, and I kinda changed my mind...it's gonna be Delena, but going along with the general ideas of the episodes. Make sense? Basically just because I don't like Stefan and want to make him as pathetic as possible, haha XD **_

**Caroline Forbes** boy likes girl + girl likes boy =sex. Remember that, Elena.

_(__**Bonnie Bennett**__ and __**ten**__ others like this)_

**Elena Gilbert** did you really have to go and make this your status?

**Caroline Forbes **it's for your own good, Gilbert.

**Jeremy Gilbert** fuck, so many unwanted mental images.

_(__**Matt Donovan **__likes this)_

**Tyler Lockwood **just because you're a virgin doesn't mean you have to be a prude, Gilbert.

**Jeremy Gilbert **hey Tyler, been to visit Vicky lately?  
Yeah, didn't think so.

_(__**Matt Donovan**_ _and __**four **__other friends like this)_

...

**Elena Gilbert **is friends with** Damon Salvatore**

_(__**Damon Salvatore**__ likes this)_

**Stefan Salvatore **Elena, we need to talk.

**Damon Salvatore **Stefan, lighten up.  
Elena, you looked beautiful earlier :) would you like to stop by in a bit? I found some baby pictures of Stefanie you might like.

**Elena Gilbert**I'd love that Damon! See you in ten :)  
I'll call you later Stefan.

**Stefan Salvatore **...goddamn it.

...

**Elena Gilbert **to **Damon Salvatore:** I have to admit, you were a very cute baby.

_(__**Damon Salvatore**__ and __**Caroline Forbes **__like this)_

**Caroline Forbes **Damon's always cute ;)

**Damon Salvatore **told you!  
And thanks for agreeing, Blondie.

**Elena Gilbert **so what went wrong between then and now? ;)

**Damon Salvatore **oh, I'm gonna get you for that Miss. Gilbert!

**Stefan Salvatore** are you fucking kidding me?

**Damon Salvatore **Stefan, was that a swear? I'm scandalized.

**Stefan Salvatore **Elena, call me. Now.

...

**(about Damon...)  
**_Between __**Caroline Forbes **__and __**Elena Gilbert**_

**Caroline Forbes **you're not interested in Damon, are you?

**Elena Gilbert **why would I be?  
And why do you ask?

**Caroline Forbes **okay good! Because Damon is like, crazy hot and I think I might have a shot!

**Elena Gilbert **what about mystery bar guy?

**Caroline Forbes **I think that was Damon!  
Anyways, wish me luck!

**Elena Gilbert **right. Luck.

...

**Elena Gilbert** night of the comet.

_(__**Thirty **__friends like this)_

**Stefan Salvatore **can we talk there? Please?

**Jeremy Gilbert **and Vicky calls me a stalker...

_(__**Matt Donovan**__, __**Caroline Forbes **__and __**fifteen **__other____friends like this)_

**Elena Gilbert **watch it, Jer.  
I'll see you there Stefan.

**Damon Salvatore **I'll see you there too, Miss. Elena ;)

**Elena Gilbert **Damon, you're coming? Can't wait!

**Caroline Forbes **Elena...no.

_(__**Stefan Salvatore **__likes this)_

...

**(no subject)  
**_Between __**Damon Salvatore **__and __**Stefan Salvatore**_

**Damon Salvatore **I saw what happened between you and Elena. Rough, little brother.  
By the way, don't wait up for me tonight.

**Stefan Salvatore **as if you care.  
Why not? Caroline? So help me Damon, if you kill her...

**Damon Salvatore** you're right, I don't.  
Nope. Elena. Have you ever been in her room? I have.

**Stefan Salvatore **very funny Damon.

**Stefan Salvatore** you can stop pretending you're with her. I know you're not.

**Stefan Salvatore **Elena isn't answering her phone. What did you do to her?

**Stefan Salvatore **...Damon?

**Stefan Salvatore** ...shit.

...

**Stefan Salvatore** to **Elena Gilbert: **why aren't you answering your phone?

...

**Stefan Salvatore **to **Elena Gilbert: **I know you're online, you're on chat.

...

**Stefan Salvatore **to **Elena Gilbert: **please call me.

**Jeremy Gilbert **this would be hilarious if it wasn't so sad.

_(__**Caroline Forbes**__ and __**twenty two **__other friends like this)_

**Tyler Lockwood **wrong, Gilbert. It's hilarious because it's so sad.

_(__**Matt Donovan**__, __**Caroline Forbes**__, and __**fifty three **__other friends like this)_


	3. A QUICK POLL! PLEASE READ!

Hey guys! Molly here!

I'm going to add another chapter later today, but before I do I wanted you guys to answer a quick question that will pretty much define how the rest of the story will go (no pressure or anything...XD)

Would you rather it...

**Be Delena, still partially canon but having Damon and Elena in a flirty/witty/sexy relationship while Stefan pouts/complains/is pathetic/is oblivious? (like chapter 2)**

**ORRRRRR**

**Be completely canon, following the episodes but with my little random comedy thingies all up in there (like chapter 1)**

Just post what you'd like to see in a review, and I'll tally them up. Thanks guys, I less than three you!


	4. My Brother's Keeper

**A/N: wow, it's been so long since I've updated and I feel terrible. Life just got in the way, but I promise I'll try to add more now!**

**Here's season four episode seven - My Brother's Keeper: Facebook Style!**

...

**Elena Gilbert**__went from _"in a relationship" to "single"_

_**(Rose-Marie **__and twenty others like this)_

**Bonnie Bennett **...excuse me

_**(Caroline Forbes, Jeremy Gilbert **__and__** three **__others like this)_

**Caroline Forbes **...what.

**Jeremy Gilbert **is no one else going to comment on the fact that Rose liked this?

**Jeremy Gilbert **dead Rose?

**Jeremy Gilbert **Rose-that-died Rose?

**Jeremy Gilbert**__okay then.

...

**Stefan Salvatore **went from _"in a relationship" to "single"_

**Caroline Forbes **you okay?

**Caroline Forbes **...wanna go have a freak-out in the woods?

_(__**Stefan Salavotre **__likes this)_

...

**(...your impending death)**

_Between __**Klaus the Bauss **__and __**Stefan Salvatore**_

**Klaus the Bauss **honestly, Stef, can you for once just keep your mouth shut for more than five minutes?

**Stefan Salvatore **Klaus the Bauss? Really? That doesn't even make sense.

**Klaus the Bauss **don't be jealous, Stef, it doesn't suit you.

**Stefan Salvatore **...so why did you message me, again? My "impending death"?

**Klaus the Bauss **the cure. You. Blabbed. Did you really think I wouldn't find out?

**Stefan Salvatore **I didn't blab, I told my brother. There's a difference.

**Klaus the Bauss **do you know what hurt the most, Stefan?

**Klaus the Bauss **the BETRAYAL.

**Klaus the Bauss **YOU BETRAYED ME.

**Klaus the Bauss **...Stefan?

...

**Damon Salvatore **to **Elena Gilbert: **Why didn't you tell me you and Stef called it quits?

**Elena Gilbert **it's been all over Facebook?

**Damon Salvatore **do you seriously think I use Facebook?

**Elena Gilbert **you're using it now, smartass.

_(__**Bonnie Bennett, Caroline Forbes **__and __**ten **__others like this)_

**Damon Salvatore **hilarious. Talk later?

**Elena Gilbert **definitely :))

**Caroline Forbes **two smiley faces? Really, Elena? REALLY?

**Rose-Marie **well I think it's cute :)

**Jeremy Gilbert **IS NO ONE ELSE SEEING THIS

**Jeremy Gilbert **UGH

...

**April Young **red or blue?

**Caroline Forbes **blue. Always blue.

**Elena Gilbert **definitely blue :)

_(__**Caroline Forbes **__likes this)_

**Damon Salvatore **red.

**Elena Gilbert **red. Definitely red! ;)

_**(Damon Salvatore **__and __**April Young **__like this)_

**Caroline Forbes **um...what?

...

**(...mind control)**

_Between __**Caroline Forbes **__and __**Stefan Salvatore**_

**Caroline Forbes **get down here, FAST! ELENA EMERGENCY!

**Stefan Salvatore **What happened?!

**Caroline Forbes **Elena liked the blue dress but then Damon liked red and now she likes red!

**Caroline Forbes **MIND CONTROL.

**Stefan Salvatore **time to lay off the coffee, Caroline.

**Caroline Forbes **BRAINWASHING.

**Caroline Forbes **COMPULSION

**Caroline Forbes **HELP STEFAN DANGER.

**Caroline Forbes **HEEEEEEEELP

...

**Jeremy Gilbert **ever dreamed about killing your sister? Because I sure have.

**Elena Gilbert **hilarious, Jeremy. Really.

**Jeremy Gilbert **no, Elena, really...

**Elena Gilbert **we get it. Funny joke. Stick to being a waiter for now, yeah?

_(__**Matt Donovan, Bonnie Bennett **__and __**five **__others like this)_

**Jeremy Gilbert **WHY DOES NOBODY EVER LISTEN TO ME?

**Damon Salvatore **because everything that happens to you is just ridiculous. Seriously.

_(__**Elena Gilbert, Bonnie Bennett **__and __**ten **__others like this)_

...

**(...eye sex)**

_Between __**Caroline Forbes **__and __**Elena Gilbert**_

**Caroline Forbes **will you please stop staring at Damon like that? It's making everyone uncomfortable.

**Caroline Forbes **and horney.

**Elena Gilbert **like what? I'm not staring? Why would I be staring? No staring here.

**Caroline Forbes **mhmm.

**Elena Gilbert **what about you and Klaus, Miss Hypocrite? Just friendly champagne and giggles, right?

**Caroline Forbes **I AM OFFENDED BY YOUR TONE MISS GILBERT.

**Elena Gilbert **what tone? We're messaging...

**Caroline Forbes **NOTHING IS HAPPENING

**Caroline Forbes **STOP

**Caroline Forbes **honestly Elena you should just drop it, you're embarrassing yourself.

**Caroline Forbes **geeze, some people...

...

**Matt Donovan **anyone seen Jer lately?

_(__**Elena Gilbert **__and __**Damon Salvatore **__like this)_

**Stefan Salvatore **nope.

**Stefan Salvatore **definitely not.

**Stefan Salvatore **keeping an eye out, though. Aren't I such a good person? No worries, no need to thank me, it's all out of the goodness of my heart.

**Jeremy Gilbert **I'm with Stefan, guys.

**Stefan Salvatore **...found him!

...

**Damon Salvatore **what is the deal with Bennett witches? Seriously...

_(__**Creepy Shane **__and __**five **__others like this)_

**Bonnie Bennett **we've just got the magic touch, I guess ;)

**Damon Salvatore **and a terrible sense of humour, too!

...

**Hayley Wolf **to **Creepy Shane: **the plan is almost complete!

**Creepy Shane **MUHAHAHAHAHA

**Tyler Lockwood **...what plan?

_(__**Caroline Forbes**_**, **_**Stefan Salvatore, Damon Salvatore, **__and __**six **__others like this)_

**Tyler Lockwood **do you two know each other?

**Hayley Wolf **is this not a message?

**Creepy Shane **who is Hayley?

**Creepy Shane **what is Facebook?

**Creepy Shane **...

**Hayley Wolf **...

**Tyler Lockwood **okay then, guess you don't know him Hales. My bad :)

_(__**Hayley Wolf **__and __**Creepy Shane **__like this)_

...

**Elena Gilbert **_Damon Salvatore _is a good dancer ;)

_(__**seven **__people like this)_

**Damon Salvatore **you're not so shabby yourself, darling :)

**Caroline Forbes ***vomits*

_(__**Stefan Salvatore **__likes this)_

**Damon Salvatore **NO ONE ASKED YOU HERE STEFAN

**Damon Salvatore **NO ONE CARES ANYMORE

**Caroline Forbes **HEY! I care!

_(__**Stefan Salvatore **__likes this)_

**Damon Salvatore **we know, Caroline. We get it. Now can you two STOP RUINING NICE MOMENTS PLEASE.

_(__**Elena Gilbert **__and __**Delena Fans **__like this)_

_..._

**(...cockblock crusaders)**

_Between __**Caroline Forbes **__and __**Stefan Salvatore**_

**Caroline Forbes **suggestions to destroy Damon and Elena: GO

**Stefan Salvatore **kill Damon?

**Caroline Forbes** no, that would just make Elena mad. Kill Elena?

**Stefan Salvatore **...

**Caroline Forbes **yeah, let's not. Talk annoyingly in the background every time they try to have a romantic moment?

**Stefan Salvatore **definitely. Anything else?

**Caroline Forbes **it has to be ridiculous.

**Stefan Salvatore **and random.

**Caroline Forbes **illogical, too.

**Stefan Salvatore** you thinking what I'm thinking?

**Carlone Forbes **SIRE BOND!

...

**Elena Gilbert **kiss me like you wanna be loved :)

**Damon Salvatore **your wish is my command ;)

_(__**Elena Gilbert **__likes this)_

**Rose-Marie **awww xx

**Jeremy Gilbert **REALLY?

**Jeremy Gilbert **NOBODY?

**Jeremy Gilbert **500% done.


End file.
